浅野さんへ
私ね、この数日『特権』について考えてました。
大人には子供にわからないような特権とかあるのかどうかを。
そもそもね、あるのかどうかとか初めて考えました。結構ちゃんと考えたんですよ。でもよくわからなかったんです。
だからね、「私にはわからない」と答えておきます。
ただそれだけだと味気ないので、『特権』について考えた過程と感じたことを少しだけ記しておきます。
「大人の」って枠じゃなく「浅野さんの」って枠で考えてみたんですよ。「大人」というものの定義がそもそもできなかったので。
出会ったころから今までの事を振り返っていたら、改めて感じたことがあったんです。
それは、「今の浅野さんがいちばん大好きで、浅野さんは今がいちばん浅野さんなんだな。」という事でした。
グっときましたか？
グっときましたよね？
オーケー。
わけがわからないかもしれないので、また今度説明しますよ。興味があればのはなしですけど。
というか、もう根本になりますけど「大人」っていったいなんなんですかね？なんだと思います？
実際の年齢？
それとも精神的な年齢？
肉体的な年齢？
私には何を指しているのかよくわかりません。
大人とはいったいどんな状態の事なんでしょうか？大人の定義ってなんですか？浅野さんはどう思いますか？
とか言ったり聞いたりしつつ「子供なのに大人っぽい事言うよね～」とか「大人の対応だったよね」とか平気で言いますし、もう41歳で立派な中年なのにまだ小娘気取りでいたりするときも多いし、小娘を気取っているのかと思いきや「若いっていいよね～」的な発言をしてみたりして、もうカオス。
なんなんだろうか、私は。
ついでに吐露してしまうと、「状況によっても言葉の意味は変わるわけだし、明確な定義なんてないんじゃないか、そしてそもそもその言葉のとり方は人によって違うわけだしそんな単なる定義に当てはめたところでどうなるっていうんだ、それを聞いてお前はどうしたいんだ。」と今思っています。
なんなんだろうか、私は。客観的にみてもとてもめんどくさいし、もう完全にカオス。
っていう状況を冷静に考えると、私は大人ではないですね。
やばいループ。
そういえば、ゴンちゃんやっとよくなりました。
ご心配おかけしました！体自体が私より小さいし、お世話もしないとならないし、べったり頼ってくるもんだから子供のような存在ですけど、人間の年齢にしたらもうすぐ70歳。
私よりもずっと大人でした。ゴンちゃん。
ねぇ浅野さん、大人っていったいなんなんだろう？
イシ
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